When losing the battle can actually be a good thing!

I’m battling with my four year old at the moment.
She’s ultra strong willed. Demanding. Stubborn. Bossy.
It makes for some pretty tough battles at times – most of which she wins!!!!
[Though I am selective in the battles I allow her to win!]
But actually, I admire her for fighting for what she wants. And if I don’t give it to her, then she gets up and gets it herself.
Mealtimes is a fine example.
Rarely does she eat what I have prepared for everyone else. Rather, she’d get her chair, push it to the cupboard, and get herself down a tin of tuna and a tin of sweetcorn which she likes to eat mixed up in a bowl, nothing added (not even a dollop of mayonnaise!)
I’m actually rather proud of her.
She is demonstrating a growth mindset.
– the willingness to challenge herself.
– to put herself at risk of failure, or disapproval.
– to not accept the status quo if it does not suit what she wants.
– to put the effort in to getting what she wants.
Research shows that a person with a growth mindset is less likely to suffer from depression.
A person with a growth mindset is more likely to achieve success, but more importantly, achieve success on their terms and with a deep seated confidence and resilience.
A person with a fixed mindset is more likely to fear pushing their boundaries.
Will actively avoid going beyond the boundaries of their capabilities because they don’t know how to handle failure.
A person with a fixed mindset can achieve greatness, but live in constant fear of being ‘found out’.
And here’s the thing – your mindset is just a belief, and you can challenge that belief.
I actively encourage this trait in my children, teaching them to try and fail, and try again, rather than expecting top grades all the time.
The trouble with constantly coming top of the class, is that there is nowhere else to go but down.
And if you have not learned how to handle failure, it becomes a much greater obstacle to overcome.
Fear of failure.
Something that plagues us all at one time or another.
Or for some of us, all the time!

Changing that mindset is easy when going through The Thrive Programme. It shows you how neither fear, nor failure, need exist.

Because your fear is just a bad use of your imagination.
And failure is just an opportunity to try another way.
And I can show you how to permanently shift your focus.

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